Family, Freedom and a Future....

This is the year that several of my friend’s oldest childen are moving out of the house and going to college. This is usually considered an opportunity by some for the freedom to pursue the future they have always dreamed of in one form or another.

I spoke with one young woman who is actually opting to live in the dorm while residing in the same town she grew up in so that (in her own words) “I will be close enough to watch and participate in my younger sisters growing up” (she has four younger sisters and her youngest sister is 7).

I couldn’t help but be struck by this as I remember my older sisters looking at going off to college as almost as much of an escape from home and mother as they did the adventure it afforded. I never got the impression they ever looked back, but if they did it was with a sense of relief they were leaving.

I remember being the one left behind………..more than once actually, the perils of being youngest I guess, but as I got older, I was almost as anxious for them to go as they were. You see we were four girls living in the upstairs of a small house and shared two bedrooms. When someone left, everyone sort of spread out, with you eventually getting your own room. That was considered a perk. In a one bathroom house, it was also considered a perk to have one less person to try to fit in front of the mirror in the mornings.

Things have changed so much now a day. Just about the time our kids were old enough to care we moved into a big beautiful new house where they each had their own bathroom—no sharing, no waiting—something their Dad was adamant about when the plans were drawn up (he grew up in a family of 9—one bath).

One of the homeschooling blogs I read has a family of 9 children, one boy, and eight girls. The girls decided that they wanted a home library bad enough that they sacrificed one of the bedrooms for it, turning the one bedroom all the girls now share into something akin to an army barracks with bunks stacked 3 high.

I found all this interesting because obviously the joy found by some at sharing a room, bathroom, and smaller house is different than that of others. Separation is something that is loathed, and decidedly avoided if possible. Perhaps it is the individuals, perhaps it is the parents, perhaps it is the times, or a little of all three.

Whatever it is, it gave me pause at this young woman’s attachment to her younger siblings to the point that she would alter her opportunities (she got a full ride to a university 8 hours away) just to remain close to her siblings and their activities. Somewhere along the line she got the message that you can have it all—family, freedom, and a future.

Good for her!